You Can’t Knock Clean If It’s HERbal

I was in the tub shaving leggies and washing hair when I heard the dog bark and nothing else.  I finished up shampooing, conditioning and heard a knock on the door.  I was home alone so, wrapped in towels, I peeked out. 

No cars out there.  Tall guy. Couldn’t see his face.  Called my son to be sure he hadn’t forgotten his key.  Nope.  Probably a Jehovah’s Witness. 

A JEHOVAH’S WITNESS HEARD ME USING MY HERBAL ESSENCES AND KEPT KNOCKING ???

Thank you for your blurb.

Glad to hear you’re feeling fly.
Up in the sky beside you.

no fucking title 

Not off the couch

To your disbelief

Depression so severe

I couldn’t go get a knife

or meet with the judge

but that was from organizing evidence

A thing I won’t need to do 

next time.

Next time I won’t be subdued by

crippling depression.

If there is a next tume5

as I’m not out of the woods 

just yet,

Count yer merry blessings

You might still drive

A woman to suicide yet!

Keep trying.

I won’t fucking stop ya.

Keep trying.

KEEP TRYING 

WHAT IN THE HELL ARE 

YA FUCKING WAITING FOR?

Ran Dumb Thoughtlessness

Sometimes, in hindsight, people aren’t things entirely foreseen, though perhaps unforeseeable in perception with acception.

Trick her, he happily does, with visions of flapjacks and blue juice memories dancing deceptively through the washed mind she long ago choreographed.

Speckles lightly, my unanabashedly duplicitous secondary attire.

Wishbone pulled by six with the force of an ant crushing a robin’s egg.

You can’t win them all all, but if you cheat [yourself] you can always think you’re winning.

The Burning Girl by Mary Karr

 

Audio PlayerWhile the tennis ball went back and forth in timeA girl was burning. While the tonic took its greenyAcid lime, a girl was burning. While the ruby sun fell

Audio Playersaa

Reminds Me of an Old Friend

While the tennis ball went back and forth in time

Audio PlayeWhile the tennis ball went back and forth in time

A girl was burning. While the tonic took its greeny

Acid lime, a girl was burning. While the ruby sun fell

From a cloud’s bent claws and Wimbledon was won

And lost, we sprawled along the shore in chairs,

We breathed the azure airs alongside

A girl with the thinnest arms all scarred and scored

With marks she’d made herself —

She sat with us in flames

That not all saw or saw but couldn’t say at risk

Of seeming impolite. And later we’d all think

Of the monk who’d doused himself with gas,

Lit a match, then sat unmoving and alert amid

Devouring light. She didn’t speak. She touched

No aspect of our silly selves.

I was the awkward guest everybody hardly knew.

She was an almost ghost her mother saw

Erasing the edges of herself each day

Smudging the lines like charcoal while her parents

Redrew her secretly into being over and

Again each night and dawn and sleepless

All years long. Having seen that mother’s love,

I testify: It was ocean endless. One drop could’ve

Brought to life the deadest Christ, and she

Emptied herself into that blazing child with all her might

And stared a hundred million miles into

The girl’s slender, dwindling shape.

Her father was the devoted king of helicopter pad

And putting green. His baby burned as we

All watched in disbelief.

I was the facile friend of friends insisting on a hug

Who hadn’t been along for years of doctors, wards,

And protocols. I forced her sadness close. I said

C’mon let’s hug it out. Her arms were white

Birch twigs that scissored stiffly at my neck till she

Slid on. That night we watched

Some fireworks on the dewy lawn for it was

Independence Day. Soon after, she was gone.

She was the flaming tower we all dared


To jump from. So she burned.

I was once best friend to an Amish girl who’d been killed in a fire by her psycho father. I miss her. She got left behind at 1916 S Madison in Wichita, Kansas with the father who terrified her. I want that house back. I want her back. 

Emotion Demotion

I give my loyalty to everyone I meet. That, in and of itself, might be called bravery. But I do it out of unchosen love. I don’t choose it. It chooses me.  Every moment of every day of my life has been self-sacrificial.  But love, love I have never received.  
It gives me great pain now. I used to be fine with it, even proud of it. I was only to happy to as a small child. I mean small, as in I can remember being like this as young as three. 

It started to bother me some in my teens and a little more in my twenties.  But I am now 47 and have never been loved not even appreciated.

I cry every day.  

I hate when I hear people say pain makes you stronger. It doesn’t. It only makes you aware of your strength. But it eventually tears you down, makes you weak.  I started life so very strong.  Now I am so weak.

Who could love the mess I have become?  Hopefully noone cause I never want to see another person as long as I live and I hope that won’t have to be much longer.

Loyalty and devotion lead to bravery.  Bravery leads to the spirit of self-sacrifice.  The spirit of self sacrifice creates trust in the power of love.

 ~Buddha

Cease & Desist Jeffrey Michael Patton

I am hereby ordering you,

Jeffrey Michael Patton
SW Beverly Court
Topeka, Kansas

to cease all communications to and about me, which constitute stalking and libel as of 06/18/2017.  This has been an ongoing issue for over one year.

You are also to stop hacking my Internet accounts, remove all spy equipment and take down all plagiarized material.

Failure to do so will result in court order and potentially prosecution.

Keri Covington